Tag Archives: edwardian ball

LoveGram: What calls you?

 

Hello friend,

I’m sending you the word “aponemia” from the Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows.

This word means “the peculiar quality of never having chosen to be born, which is shared by everyone else around you; the curious awareness that even though earthly life might be the most exciting party in the universe, somehow everyone in attendance had been dragged here by a friend or stumbled in by accident.”

I’m sending you my deepest gratitude that somehow you got to this party.

And that somehow, against all odds, you and I found one another here, on the dance floor.

I’m sending you a moment of thinking of everyone in your life and how miraculous it is that out of seven billion people, here you all are, together.

***

In today’s LoveGram, we talk about how life drops little spiritual breadcrumbs for us to find.

We talk about how we are called to places inside ourselves or to parts of ourselves that long to be expressed on the outside.

(To listen to the audio, just scroll down on this page and click play on the audio player below!)

***

On Friday, I published a blog post with some photos from the Edwardian Ball.

I shared with you about how the longing to be loved and to belong can sometimes overshadow our own sense of self.

I shared with you that feeling of coming home to myself in a way I’ve longed for — for decades.

If you missed that post, I hope you will read it now. It is directly connected to this question I ask today: What is calling to you?

Is there something calling you home to yourself in a new way?

What is it? 

Will you heed the call?

Thank you for being here.

You are not alone.

We are all just walking each other home. (Ram Dass)

Seek Celebration — even in dark corners,

Xo

S.

 

P.S. The  beautiful book I mentioned in the first line, “Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows” is by John Koenig.

P.P.S. Meet the pink-haired girl I talk about here in this video. My favorite favorite part is right at minute two!

 

{Celebration Moment} No Regret.

 

Hello my friend!

Earlier this week, I was listening to an audio by my mentor, Brendon Burchard on the topic of “no regret.”

Something he said really jumped out at me: “Don’t just think about who you are — express it!”

This quote reminded me of the rather famous book by Bronnie Ware, “The Top Five Regrets of the Dying.” Bronnie was a hospice nurse and she wrote about the poignant and powerful things that her patients most regretted.

The first one she writes about is: “I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.”

Please pause for moment and think about this for yourself.

***

Due to a lot of cultural conditioning, sometimes we are more concerned with fitting in or belonging than we are in being true to who we really are.

I sure know this place.

As a young person, I experienced that longing to belong to such a degree that at some point it felt like I had lost myself. As the years passed and I entered my late twenties, I grew deeply depressed — though on the outside I remained bubbly and fun because that’s who I thought people wanted me to be.

Looking back, I see that it was repression of my authentic self that was causing the depression. I call that person “Cardboard Sherry,” because she feels so flat, so uninspired.

She was afraid that she wouldn’t be loved. She so desperately wanted love that she gave up her own desires, opinions, and beliefs in order to fit in, thinking that would get her love.

Thankfully, I was led to meditation and creativity. As I began an intentional path of presence and true creative expression — connecting to writing, art, dance, quirky events, and unconventional living — the depression lifted.

I was buoyed by living my life.

***

I’ll be 58 this year and I feel more alive and more myself than ever before. This past weekend, I donned a pink bobbed wig, green crinoline, fingerless gloves, and bubblegum-colored combat boots to attend the Edwardian Ball with my beau. 

(Note: in case you missed my Sunday LoveGram, it was all about using joy to fuel us in these times of heartbreak and grief.)

Dancing in the historic ballroom filled with colorful and creative Edward Gorey-esque characters — San Franciscans and kindred spirits from all over — I felt as if I’d fully come home to myself.

***

I’ve realized over the years that the true sense of belonging comes not from pretending to be like others, but from being 100% myself.

It comes from belonging to my own heart and belonging in my own life. It comes from belonging with others who are committed to the living their best, most authentic life.

And you know what? That’s what I appreciate so much about you.

We are a community of people who are chipping away at regret and taking steps toward living fully expressed.

***

There is so much heartache in the world right now, I encourage you to find a slice of time to connect with whatever kind of novelty or play YOU love.

What brings you to life? You deserve it and I promise you, it will energize you and lift your spirit. 

In my coaching group this week, we went around the circle and shared moments that we felt most alive.

It was extraordinarily uplifting to hear each person’s story.

I would love to hear yours. If you want, please email me a photo that shows YOU living your best self out loud. Tell me a sentence or two about it.

I promise you, sharing it will lift you up. And I know, it will elevate my spirits, too. When we are fully alive and when we share those stories of feeling fully alive, it is palpable joy.

Your vitality is a gift for everyone. 

***

YOU MATTER!

I can’t wait to share in your joy of being alive.

Celebration is waiting for us. 

I love you and am cheering you on, always.

Thanks for who you are.

Seek celebration — even in the dark corners,

xo Sherry

 

LoveGram: Permission to feel joy

Hello friend,

I’m sending you big hugs and the word, “chrysalism” from the Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows.

This word means “the amniotic tranquility of being indoors during a thunderstorm.”

I’m sending you that feeling. That warmth. That safety.

I’m sending gratitude for any of us who may be healthy and safe.

(May I never take it for granted in my life.)

***

In today’s audio LoveGram, we talk (again) about what it is like to feel joy when others are suffering.

We talk about what it is like to hold it all.

We talk about being a human being living in a world that is so heart-achingly beautiful and at the same time, so heart-breakingly sad.

We talk about letting our joys fuel us to help others. (We fill up our own wells, so we have plenty to give to others.)

Click here and scroll down to listen. 

***

I hope you will lie down someplace comfortable or sit in a cozy chair with your tea while you listen.

Rituals and small comforts are so important. Give yourself that today, okay?

I love you and I send you big hugs.

Seek Celebration — even in dark corners,

Xo

S.

P.S. In case you really need something uplifting to read — and not just to listen to — did you catch my story the other day about what kind of love and connection is possible in just six minutes? Here’s that link.

P.P.S. Of course, there is also the beautiful book I mentioned in the first line, “Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows” by John Koenig.

We need more joy!

Remember last week I was telling you the story of how my beau and I almost missed the crazy beautiful lunar eclipse?

I made a video about it because it has such an impact on me. I mean, heck, I’m a coach. I talk about following through on intention all the time. And yet, that ole Squawky Polly mind almost had me choose the comfy couch over a rare (and romantic) lunar happening!

How is it possible to be so easily lured into listening to a voice in my head that tells me what I should do or not do?  Especially when I know that voice is always wanting me to lie low and live listlessly?

I’ve been thinking about this so much lately.

***

Here’s something related, something I also nearly missed: The Edwardian Ball.

Every year in San Francisco (and Los Angeles, too!) there is an enchanting steampunk event filled with music, performances, fashion, and a whole lotta beauty.

Ian and I almost skipped it this year. “It’s too expensive.” “Finding what to wear takes so much time.” “Do we really need to attend again?”

There were those voices. There was that same process of dragging us down.

Thank goodness we didn’t listen. Instead, we focused on how connecting it is for us to go and how it always makes us so happy.

And so … we went. we had a blast, it was an amazing night!

I’ve been thinking about how important it is for people to be surrounded by beauty, color, music, and laughter.

We need it.

It would be easy to think of something like this ball as frivolous when there are so many serious and important happenings in the world. When there is so much hardship. When there is so much violence, anger, and divisiveness.

But an event like this feeds people’s spirits. I think it brings us back to our basic human joy of being together in celebration. Being called to be creative and being given the space for self -expression are so important.

Lightness + joy can bring out the best in us.

I know it is a luxury. And I am so grateful.

 

This makes me think about when I visited Mali, West Africa, in the 1990’s. I was enchanted with the colorful clothing and with the drumming/music. People gathered outside frequently to be together and sing/dance/play music. There is such a depth of connection that comes from that shared joy. Music and color and expression are woven into the culture.

It seemed to me that families didn’t need a reason to dance, sing, or wear colorful clothing. They just created it. In the mud huts or in the dusty streets. An abundance of joy and community.

We need more of it. (Joy, laughter, community.)

****

What does it look like for YOU?

I don’t know what it looks like for you. It might not be African drumming or a steampunk ball. Maybe it is listening to classical music while watching the lunar eclipse. Maybe it is baking cookies with your children and decorating them in crazy colors then dancing around the kitchen together. Maybe it is wearing your best dress + lighting some candles when you make pizza at home with your spouse tomorrow evening. Maybe it is making art and hiding it for people to find in a public place. Maybe it is going to see dance or an art exhibit that calls to you. Maybe it is knitting colorful gloves for the homeless. Maybe it is making art yourself, even with finger paints. Maybe it is simply singing out loud as you walk home from the bus stop.

What kind of music or self-expression or color do you long to have more of in your life?

Do you have the support you need to keep moving toward it?

****

Joy is infectious.

I know part of the reason this Edwardian Ball is so much fun is because everyone who attends REALLY SHOWS UP. People take the time to create amazing costumes and to bring an openness to be enchanted. They show up ready to connect + laugh.

I’ve attended a camp for adults that is called Life is a Verb Camp, created by Patti Digh. It is completely different, but also the same. People show up for that event ready to experience magic and connection. There is an intention set way before the camp ever starts. People crave creativity + authentic connection and so they become it. They bring it.

I think we need more of this in our daily lives. This intention to find magic.

When I write that, I can’t help but think of Bill Cunningham, who said, “Those who seek beauty are sure to find it.”

We can be better at helping one another seek and create beauty and joy.

And why not? Life is fleeting. It goes by so fast! We can create excuses to dance and laugh together. We can make up holidays. We can celebrate way more than we allow ourselves to.

Let’s do!

I really think one of my main purposes here on earth, but more specifically, as a high performance coach, is to help people open up more and more to what lights them up. What feels like a celebration of your own unique spirit?

From that lit-up place of celebration in ourselves and our own lives, we easily access a well of generosity to give to others.

As I’m writing that, I’m thinking how much fun it would be to do a very small group coaching program that kickstarts that place of being lit up. How great it would be to journey together and explore who we want to be in the world and how we find the energy/time to make that happen.

What do you think?

Email me at Sherry @Simplycelebrate.net and let me know if you’d like to be a part of a short, three or four- week kickstart joy group.

 

Seek celebration — even in dark corners,

xo Sherry