Valentine’s Gifts for Troubled Hearts02-12-2017
Do you know someone who has a troubled heart this Valentine’s Day?
It could be someone who is grieving the loss of a loved one through death, divorce, or break-up.
It might be someone who has lost their job or is struggling with global or political issues that have left them stressed or fearful.
Or, maybe you know someone who is depressed or overwhelmed?
What if you used Valentine’s Day as a reminder to reach out and put love in action?
What to do for someone with a troubled heart?
I just published an article on Huffington Post with some ideas of gifts for people with troubled hearts. Please read, comment, and share. And choose one thing on the list to do for someone in your life who needs a love boost.
I also just posted the replay of our wonderfully fun workshop last week during which my dear friends from The Creativity Caravan helped participants come up with ten amazingly creative and specific prompts to write a Love List. Sit down with a piece of paper, think about someone with a troubled heart, and create your Love List on he spot with this audio workshop. (You don’t have to opt in and we’re not selling anything — it’s just part of my mission to help spread pinpricks of light!)
A balm for future hurting hearts?
I want to spend a few minutes on something that isn’t very popular to talk about, but which is something that is one of the greatest gifts we can give people we love: planning for our death. To me, planning our death is the last gift we can give people. And it is one that can help soothe and heal traumatized and grieving hearts.
I’ve had that awful experience of someone I love dying and there’s nothing in writing anywhere about how they want to be buried or what kind of service they want or even how to contact their friends or find their financial accounts. It can be so awful to try to figure all of that out while also grieving.
So last fall I took a class my friend Jane was offering and I created a binder that has everything in one place. People I love know to grab that if I die. It has my will + health forms + friend contacts + funeral wishes. I am still updating it and adding things like social media legacy wishes + where to find important stuff. Doing this is not morbid at all. It feels so loving!
And the crazy thing is — those of us in Jane’s class really had FUN. We laughed a lot. We also supported each other through some hard questions. Jane brings a lovely warmth + ease + compassion to this essential planning process.
For me, remembering I am going to die helps me be here NOW. It helps me get clear on what is important to me and what legacy I want to leave. Others in the class expressed the same thing.
I got Jane on the phone after the class was over so we could talk about ways in which the class impacted me and transformed my life. If you have 15 minutes, I’d love for you to listen. This conversation may change the way you think about death.
If this topic interests you, you can also attend a free online talk Jane is offering on February 13th at 11am PT/2pmET called “5 Things to Do Right Now To Save Your Loved Ones Headache and Heartache After You Die.”
What if you’re the one whose heart is troubled?
If you’re having a hard time, be sure to reach out to someone you love and ask for what you need. My spiritual teacher, Cheri Huber, always says, “Don’t let the voices get you alone in the dark.” What she means is that the voices in our head can be very cruel. They often kick us when we’re down. They tell us we don’t deserve love or that we can’t reach out because we’ll be a dark cloud. Don’t listen to any of that rubbish!
It can be such a gift when someone opens up to us and invites us to express our compassion and love. Let yourself receive whatever good things are available; you deserve it.
Here’s to love of all shapes and sizes,
P.S. If your own heart is troubled or if you just need a sense of connection, listen to this short audio I created. It contains one of my favorite lines of poetry ever: “You do not have to be good.”